The funny thing is that I’ve been waiting for this all day long. But I only realized how much I needed it when the first tears came to my eyes. I don’t know what for I just cried… if it was for the music, the melody, my life or for the million feelings I’m trying to understand right now.
Other funny thing is that I also need help to know all of this freaking things but, I don’t want to. I’m sure I cannot express myself in the right way and, even if I could, I wouldn’t want to. Why can’t the people, that say that know me the most, understand that I don’t want to be understood. That was a fase, and I already passed it, I don’t need it back, it’s gone now. I don’t feel like talking and if, and when, I cry in my room or in some corner, I’m crying to myself, I don’t want anyone to see. Not because I’m afraid of what they’re gonna think of me (I passed that too) but, yes, because I’m afraid of what they’re gonna ask. I don’t want more questions, that I don’t even understand, in my mind… so please don’t asked them. If I cry alone, I’m doing it for me, I’m trying alone to figure out things for myself.
I’m not cold-hearted. I just like to have my moments of silence pain, just like everybody.
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